True to Taruian personality, I am a tenacious man. Tenacity comes because of the courage and the inner conviction that some thing can be done.
Time and again, I have proved this officially. I had the guts (and sometimes insanity) to pick up a sinking (or a tough) project and sail through with steadfastness to finish the project in style. It has happened more than enough to give me enough courage to believe in myself; to come out of the inferiority complex that I once suffered from.
Of late, I have written of my excessive obsession about getting fit physically. For the past 6 months, I have beaten my body to trim it and bring it to shape. I have lost 5 kilos and about 3 inches of waist. Even with wheezing, I was able to jog for 8 km/hr – every single day; day after day. I�m still not the way I want, but I�m more than pleased with the results so far.
For the past few days, as I persist in jogging, something dawned on me. I was never persistent in the matters of love – here I mean the literal one; not the passions for photography or travel.
Even when liked a gal in a group that I was associated with, I never had the guts to express it, as I always considered myself as not-so-handsome guy. Even when a gal expressed her desire, I never put myself completely into the relation, thereby letting the beautiful life pass-by.
As everything in life, even in love, what one gives is what one gets. I never gave myself fully into it; but had the lunacy to complain of thousand things, why I never got love.
I used to do the same about friendship. But over the years, I changed myself, instead of complaining and expecting others to change, I changed myself to be a person others can befriend. That thought process and the whole change was phenomenal and I am glad that I went through it.
Now I am realizing that I need to be same in the matters of love. I need to be persistent and give myself completely to get what I want, rather than moaning the lack of it. The very realization is encouraging.
I know it is not going to ‘tomorrow-love-will-blossom-and-day-after-tomorrow-I-will-be happy’. It will take time. But I am going to give myself completely into it; going to be persistent when I don’t feel like it or things don’t go in the way I expect. Fundamentally, I am going to bring my character into this area of my life too. I’m sure this will bring in a unique but extraordinary change into my life.
But before that, there are some things to settle; few others to score; and a whole lot to forget. (It is okay if you don’t understand the meaning of this sentence). I am going to take some drastic changes.
