Contrary to the last weekend, this weekend was a relaxing and a stress-free one. I didn’t do programming, I didn’t work, I didn’t do anything that I would distress me; nor anything that would piss-me-off occured. Good weekend!

Now you are wondering about the title. Here it goes…

I was listening to George Michael’s ‘Listen without Prejudice’. The chorus goes like this:

And it’s hard to love
There’s so much to hate
Hanging on to hope
When there is no hope to speak of

I realised that it is honestly true. Though I put on a mask and smile and laugh and make others laugh, I have so much of hate within myself. I cannot express whom I am angry at: is it on God, or on the society, or on myself? I don’t know. One thing for sure, there is so much of anger within me. How much ever I calm myself, it gets out its nasty head time to time.

What makes it worse is that I don’t have someone with whom I can be just myself – a silly-billy boy, cracking silly jokes, drinking and dancing. I did have one; but it is a history now. Being careful with everyone and not being yourself is so bloody annoying.

When I was in Chennai, I used to go to this Casuarina groove near Mahabalipuram where there was absolutely no crowd and I could sit there as long as I wanted without being disturbed; enjoying sunsets and moon coming out the sea. Though it is called Garden City, I find there is no quiter place here in Bangalore.

Anyway the point is, I cannot go long like this. Either I would put a gun to my head or end up in a nut house. I don’t know which one I prefer!

Until recently I was very much passionate about a gal who was very much passionate about her religion – Hinduism. That is when I went and bought ‘Am I a Hindu? the Hinduism Primer’ by Ed Viswanathan to get a deeper knowledge on Hinduism. Having read Ramayana (by Kambar), Mahabaratha and Arthamulla Inthumatham (Meaningful Hinduism) by Kannadasan and lived most of my life in India, I have a fairly good knowledge of Hinduism. However, I wanted to know more. This book provides a simple yet elegant way of a Father-and-Son dialogue to explore various aspects of this ancient religion. If a westerner or a non-Hindu wants to get an introduction to Hinduism, then this book will serve the purpose.

Speaking of Hinduism, I consider it as a way of life (a culture) than a religion. It teaches a way of conducting oneself at every stage of life (coming to think of it, the early books of Old Testament, collectively called as Torah, does the same). I also visited a Hindu temple and in a structural view, a temple resembles a synagogue: the worship place consists of outer courtyard, the place of worship and the most holy place. Another note worthy aspect of Hinduism is that there is no unified school of thought as found in Judeo-Christian threads. One might presume that this will spoil the essence and hinder the growth. Interestingly, no. It is this very aspect that has caused Hinduism to thrive and spread its wings everywhere. Whenever there was a threat, like Buddhism or